Marriage And Cohabitation Essay

Marriage And Cohabitation Essay-36
Many cohabiting couples who decide to get married assume that the difference between the two is minor.

Many cohabiting couples who decide to get married assume that the difference between the two is minor.This assumption is, after all, a major justification for cohabitation before marriage: it is considered to be a kind of test, in similar circumstances, of the couple's suitability for marriage.

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As a result of these effects people who cohabit will marry even if they might not do so if they had not cohabited.

However, in the case of the learning effect they will do so for the right reasons—that is, reasons that will enhance the quality of their relationship; in the case of the increase in the cost of separation, the decision to marry is taken for the wrong reasons, since these are temporary reasons that have no significant value for long-term marital quality.

It is interesting to note that the negative effects of cohabitation upon marriage are considerably reduced when cohabitation begins after engagement; that is, when the decision to marry is taken before the couple cohabits.

In this case, the decision to get married takes place when the weight of cost, relative to love, was not bigger.

I believe that the nature of the correlation between cohabitation and marital quality depends on both types of factors, and the interaction between these types of factors is complex and dynamic.

All the positive and negative effects mentioned here—that is, the positive learning effects of trial marriage and the negative inertia effects—are indeed present in the transition from cohabitation to marriage.

Why is it that a phenomenon that has become so common, and whose main justification is to increase compatibility, has such disputable results?

Commitment theory distinguishes between forces that motivate connection versus forces that increase the costs of leaving.

When a couple enters a marital relationship after having cohabitated, their passion is not at its peak, as frequency of sexual activity declines steadily as the relationship lengthens, reaching roughly half the frequency after one year of marriage compared to the first month of marriage, and declining more gradually thereafter.

If people have reached their peak of passion during cohabitation, they come to the challenging years of marriage without the drive that passion gives the relationship and that provides the energy to overcome the challenges of that they will need to face in a marital framework.


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